Ang mga lalaki ng kolehiyo ko! :D

This last picture of ours reminds me not pain but happiness, light and new door. Our closure was the best so far. We already moved on with our own lives, but the memories will last forever. Thank you! You’ll always gonna be my Toothpick. ^_^

So how do you really define the word “soulmate”? I don’t even know if it is really a word or just a plain sudo that everyone invented in this generation.

Honestly, I don’t have any idea of what truly a soulmate is. I don’t know any signs or any clue if that person standing right in front of you is suppose to be your best partner for a lifetime or simply NOT. I don’t know if it’s a case to case basis but I don’t think it is. But what I’m certain is - and this doesn’t appear on most websites - is that, it is felt.

I don’t really believe in soulmate or best partner ever. For a kind of person like me whose gender’s a problem in the society, thinking of those kinds is just a fairytale. Or more often it is. Soulmate is only for them. For him and for her. For this and for that. But how fair would it be to feel such kind of chills and urges for someone if we are both human as well? Whether what gender you have, if you’re a human being, you are capable of feeling.

It’s been years since I loved my best friend… and still loving him. At first, I thought it was like some other love that will come and go. But that’s what I thought. Of course, he doesn’t love me. Technically, literally and emotionally. For the years that I’ve been loving him, I’ve been moving forward as well. There’s this days I almost didn’t think about him… or he’s almost not in my mind. There’s this nights that I don’t feel him. Sometimes it felt nice. It really is. But never a day gone by that he’s not on the back of my mind. And never a night goes by that he’s not in my heart.

I still love him. That’s it. Or should I say, I love him. There’s always this kind of feeling that draws me back everytime I think of him. He’s unlike any other guy that was just ‘literally’ part of my past. He’s always living on my present and gazing on my future.

I’ve never known the meaning of soulmate since I felt chills and urges for him. Sometimes, there’s this scenario while I’m riding on a tricycle and something, deep down in my chest, a feeling of sudden urge that I’d never felt before, then suddenly he just pops up on my mind. This usually and always happens whenever he’s not feeling fine or he’s lonely and sad or he’s thinking of me as well. The feeling of connection in which his emotions or whatsoever is connected to me. It’s inevitable because I just feel it everytime. And it hits me unexpectedly. That’s why, whenever I tell him I can feel him, usually, emotionally, technically and literally, I do feel him. But of course he wouldn’t believe me.

I’d like to think sometimes that soulmate is just a fuzzy maraca. But I guess soulmates are real. They are the ones who will teach you how to be the you effortlessly. When I’m with him, I’m automatically myself. Out of the sparks of love that I feel whenever I see him, I also feel like I’m safe with him even though he’s more of like a toothpick. Haha.

For those years that I’ve been loving him. Never a day came that whenever I see him, or whenever I think of him, I don’t feel nervous. Not the nervous that frightens you but the nervous that felt so great inside and out.

Technically, I don’t know how soulmate works. And we seldom see each other. It’s a mess sometimes to think of those words when usually, nothing happens between the two of you. Nothing physical. But one thing’s for sure… it felt different.

They said the word soulmate should work for both of you. That’s the problem, I guess. I’m the only one between the two of us who feels this kind of skips, chills and urges. I’m the one who feels the connection. Sad to say, he don’t. That is the parting word of this whole damn prose. If he doesn’t feel it that way as well… might as well, he’s not the word “soulmate” for you. Or maybe, he is.

In real life, love has to be possible. Even if it is not returned right away, love can only survive when the hope exists that you will be able to win over the person you desire.
{ Paulo Coelho }


We can’t let go of the person or love or friendship without letting go of the lesson.

#ThisHappens :D

LIGHTS UP: This Christmas, let the happiness chill your lungs as the we celebrate and enjoy the different colors of experiences that we’ve met throughout the year. Merry Christmas Everyone! ^_^